2012 was a year filled with so many activities, people, events, etc, that have affected my life in one form or the other but I’ll share this particular one now because it struck something in me that remains till this day.
For the first time in my life, I was really put down in front of close to fifteen people. When I say put down, I mean my personality was seriously attacked in a management meeting. I worked for an oil and gas firm at the time. We come together on Monday mornings to have what we call “Operations Meeting”. The management staff and some senior staff meet to discuss the operations of the previous week, and then make projections for the new week.
To get this meeting rolling, the different business units make presentations concerning their units and at the end questions are asked and clarifications are made. While I was making my own presentation, the then DMD (Deputy managing Director) began to ask a few questions which I answered to the best of my knowledge. He spotted out some errors in my presentation, and started to criticize. He began to tongue lash me in a way he had never done before, he used so many derogatory words that made me angry, called me all sorts of names, in front of close to 15 people including my subordinates. This was the height of humiliation!
At some point I could not take it any more I got up and walked out of the meeting to get myself together because it got to a point I couldn’t hold back the tears from falling. After some minutes, I went back into the conference room as I was the one coordinating the meeting and had to see it through, he continued from where he stopped and this upset me real bad. I had a real bad Monday morning.
My learning points from this incidence are as follows:
- Never let anyone’s comments about you get to you.
- When you are put down never retaliate in anger as you will only end up bringing yourself down to the other person’s level.
- You don’t need someone else’s approval of yourself. Just be you, that way whatever comments made doesn’t get you upset.
- Don’t give room for criticism of any kind by making sure you put in your best in whatever you do.
Being put down in isn’t very pleasant to deal with, but I decided to use it to my own advantage by working on my weaknesses and focusing more on my strengths. That is the best solution to being destructively criticized.
Do have a beautiful day.