Have you ever felt there was no need to go on? Have you ever woke up in the morning and felt like staying back in bed all day doing nothing? Have you ever been so busy with activity and then no matter what you achieve you still feel there is something missing? Have you missed so many opportunities simply because you can’t find a reason to accomplish them? You are experiencing emptiness!!
Emptiness is a feeling of void and nothingness that is felt at some point or the other in an individual’s live. This feelings range from;
- a feeling of lack of purpose,
- a lack of meaning to life,
- loss of self worth and impulsivity,
- low motivation and interest in activities that were previously enjoyed,
- feeling like a stranger to oneself,
- inability to feel any emotions
- deep sadness e.t.c.
Emptiness is rather subjective and can be caused by both external and internal factors. Emptiness can be felt when;
- there is a loss of a loved one to death or separation.,
- one feels betrayed by a loved one or,
- you are going through a break up,
- there is a sudden change in living conditions,
- loss of a job,
- there is an experience of repeated failures,
- you experience miscarriages,
- there has been some sort of abuse (it could be physical, emotional, financial abuse)
- people passed through traumatic childhood experiences.
- there is a personality disorder.
It is often noticed that when people go through these traumatic experiences, they tend to want to numb the feelings or cope with the feelings by indulging in drugs, alcohol, getting occupied with work, entering new relationships or developing one new bad habit. These attempts at filling the emptiness felt within only worsens the situation as they gradually creep into a much darker and empty space.
How to deal with the feeling of emptiness.
- Acknowledge your feelings and try to understand why you feel the way you do. Feel your feelings. If you have to cry, then cry. If you have to scream then scream. Sit with your emotions but don’t get caught up in them or thoughts that feed them.
- Don’t bottle up your feelings: Do something to let it all out, but let it out in a constructive manner, not in a destructive way. Find a creative outlet for these feeling. It’s very unhealthy to bottle up your feelings. You can pickup a hobby, it could be dancing, drawing, singing, running, working out, sewing, e.t.c. Just do something that comes to you naturally. You could even volunteer to do something to help other people. Doing this will provide you a sense of calm confidence.
The highest expression of love for yourself and the world is sharing those gifts freely and abundantly.
- Learn more about yourself: You can learn more about yourself by asking yourself some very important questions. Try to understand your personalty, how it impacts your thought process and how you feel. Understand what matters most to you in life. The answers to all these questions can give you a sense of direction as well.
- Love on you: Its time to pamper you. You can have fun by yourself, take yourself to see a movie, give yourself a treat, go for a massage, take care of your body, travel alone at least once in a year, forgive yourself for past mistakes, put up some boundaries by sometimes saying no to others, list out your accomplishments and celebrate yourself, eat healthy, play!! Treat yourself like someone you love. Embrace your dark sides. Embrace you beautiful side. Embrace who you truly are.
You are born with unique gifts. The gifts can be anything from athletic performance, to empathy, to humor, to spirituality, to business acumen, and everything in between. The real work of learning to love yourself is learning to see who you truly are and accepting it all. The highest expression of love for yourself and the world is sharing those gifts freely and abundantly.
- Carve out time to explore your own dreams and Aspirations. What were those dreams and aspirations you had for yourself as a child? What are those things and ideas you always wanted to birth that you couldn’t. It’s time to set goals and work towards achieving those dreams. This can help fight emptiness caused by hopelessness, and a lack of direction.
Above all of these solutions, having an intimate relationship with God Almighty your creator is most important. I have come to realize that we are spiritual beings on a physical journey. Hence anything we feel physically or emotionally was first felt spiritually before it became manifested in the physical. If you feel a detachment from yourself and the world, or you are feeling hopeless, helpless, worthless, confused, anxious, e.t.c, its didn’t just come from the blue, there is some form of spiritual emptiness going on as well. It is best to treat the root cause of these issues and not the symptoms. The spirit permeates every part of our physical experiences.
Mathew 11:28-2928 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
No matter how empty we are feeling, or what must have triggered the feeling of emptiness, when we surrender all our worries to God, there is a feeling of peace even when our situation hasn’t changed. Even when we are still going through the vicissitudes of life, we go through it with a peace that surpasses all understanding because God says when we come to Him with all our problems, He will give us rest in our souls. God is not saying when you walk with Him that you will not have problems, but God is promising you that the problems will not weigh you down.
God is calling you to have an intimate relationship with Him. He wants to pour out His spirit to fill you up if only you walk with Him on this journey called life. When God fills you up, the emptiness you feel starts to fade.
When you are feeling hopeless, anxious and lacking purpose, God is saying in Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.